Random day dreams

Today at work (Nasty Pig) I was wearing rolled up denim shorts, a white Nasty Pig shredder, some beat up white tube socks with green stripes, and my block high top chucks. I don't know why, but at one point I saw myself in the mirror and pictured myself standing before a Man with those tube socks stuffed in my mouth and my chucks tied to my balls and dangling between my legs. And once I had it in my head, it was hard to think of anything else.

Let's hear it for day dreams, huh?

UPDATE: 2:19am

Apparently dreams come true. A friend of mine saw this post and made a proposition to me. Wasn't sure on it, but I said what the fuck. 20 mins later he was at my place.

When he got here I was gagged with those skater socks I mentioned, naked, and had my balls tied. I stripped him, tied his hands behind his back, then tied him in simple chest harness. I gagged him with a plug gag and tied it to the harness. Lastly, I took my the chuck taylor high tops I was wearing all day and tied both to each of our balls. I tied my own wrists behind my back, and proceeded to play tug of war for twenty mins. It was young, and playful, but it was pretty hot.

I guess day dreams can come true.

Orders

You know, I wanted to write a bit about something that turns me on. I like being bossed around. I like being given orders and expected to complete them. Now while that may seem obvious to a lot of you who have read even one post on this blog, let me clarify. I enjoy this completely independently of any sort of Dom/sub relationship. The relationships I have written about before deal with love, trust, and emotional, mental, and sexual fulfillment. The type of orders I am talking about (lately at least) have been coming from a top I used to play with years ago, who I had developed a more platonic friendship with recently. Until a month or two ago, we hadn't played in a long time. Frankly I don't even remember how it happened, but recently we realized we both enjoyed the process of him giving me orders for fun.

This isn't really submission. There are aspects of it that deal with submission, but really this is just about sexual gratification for both parties. This is why a lot of people in the community would look down on such an exchange; "I'm not really submitting, I am just playing". And yeah, I am. And hey, I have no problem with that. Play is great! It's fun. It's non-serious. It doesn't add any additional responsibility to my life. Does it fulfill me like a Sir/boy relationship would? Of course not. But why does that matter? I don't expect it to meet all my needs, just this very specific one. When I get his emails with my instructions that he came up with, it makes my dick hard. It gets me all excited, and what more could I ask for from such a simple exchange?

Keep in mind: THIS IS NOT AN INVITATION FOR YOU ALL TO EMAIL ME ORDERS HAHAHA. He and I have a very well-established connection, which has a lot to do with why this works for us. However, please leave feedback or questions. Who knows what may be in store for me if he sees a lot of positive responses/requests on here!

Spring Cleaning

It is absolutely beautiful out. The weather is warm, but still crisp. The sun is shining. The birds are singing. I have the windows wide open and am ready to give my new apartment a vigorous spring cleaning. If only there were someone to put me in some gear or enforce some rules on me while I do. Oh well, I guess I will just enforce them myself. What do you think guys? Balls tied; sock gagged, collared? May not be much, but it beats cleaning normally! haha

Happy Spring!

Black Party

This year I went to my first Black Party in NYC. I had won tickets last year in the most tragic bar contest you could ever imagine, but just had Greg scalp them since A) I wasn't interested and B) was not going to be in NYC at the time. This year though I was hired by Vance to lead a bondage scene at the event (like I do for him on Friday's at Splash). More or less, the idea was to spend three hours creating a spider web of rope on a huge 10x10 frame, tie a boy to it, and lead a scene. All simple enough, and the pay was decent. Besides, it got me a free ticket to the event.

I am not much of a circuit party boy (or even much or a night life boy to be frank), but I was certainly curious about the event itself. I had been working non stop for the days leading up to the party, so I figured I would show up, do my scene, and leave.

I got there around 11:30 with Brian from the NYBC who was doing an identical scene elsewhere at the party. He had already suggested I tie up one of our mutual acquaintances, and since I didn't have a better suggestion, I agreed. We all met up at the ballroom and got situated before starting our scenes. The web took about two hours to make, and the scene prob took 30 or 40 mins. I think it was hot (or at least entertaining) for the audience, but me and the bottom had absolutely no chemistry (nor a particular fondness for each other), which made the whole scene feel like just another job (which it was).

However, the one surprise I got at Black Party was another example of my ever shifting sexual and emotional needs. Now, in the days before BP I had worked a lot at Nasty Pig. All of us felt like we must have sold a third of the gear that was worn at BP, and we met a large number of party goers in the day before. Many were hot, and I flirted with plenty (as is my prerogative hehe). I figured I would run into a few at the party, and was open to something happening.

Sure enough, I did run into a few. One in particular struck my fancy. A very handsome, bearded, muscular, broad, masculine man from LA. He came up to the platform I was on grabbed my leg. When I looked down I grinned broadly. We had flirted a lot in the store, and I thought he was just the sexiest guy. We talked for a bit, and started kissing. You know how some guys are just amazing kissers? Well that is exactly what he was. He was sweet and flirtatious, and just the best damn kisser I had met in a while. We kissed for a while, and eventually I started sucking his dick (which was thick, mouthwatering, and so suckable). However, it didn't last long. He picked me up, and we started kissing again, and frankly I couldn't have been happier. It seemed innocent, and somewhat ridiculous considering the venue, but I just could have stood kissing him all night.

Eventually I had to get back to my scene, and he told me he would be right there watching. ^ _ ^. The scene happened, and we had no chemistry and it was work. Afterwards I looked for my new connection and found that he was gone. I started to think he might have left after seeing the rather sexual scene, not realizing how much I would have rather been with him. So I untied the web and spent the rest of the party exploring/keeping my eye out for him. I never found him.

But during my intense search, I started to realize all the guys who had there dicks out just waiting for a boy like me to suck them off weren't tempting me even slightly. Usually NSA no recip cock service is my thing. But on this black night of nights, I just wasn't feeling it. All I wanted to do was find my big furry fella and kiss him deeply. It's opened my eyes a little bit. I haven't had a boyfriend in almost six years (David and I were never in a committed relationship). I have seen guys, but to be honest, I have always been happily (and preferably) single. But maybe I want to stop sleeping around. Maybe I'm ready to find just one guy. Maybe I'm ready to meet my someone just for me.

Shout out

To the fellow who came up to me in Chipotle tonight just to tell me you loved my blog, thank you. You really made my night ^ _ ^!

Ben