Again, this is a recap post trying to keep you all up to date on whats been going on. So last week I went to the eagle with the same Sir as in my previous post. For a while now the idea of exhibitionism/public display have intrigued me greatly. Mixed with bondage, it also becomes objectification (which I have always found hot). The idea of being kept bound, gagged, and, possibly, stripped in public has always been a really hot idea to me. I don't mean public as in secretly, getting off on the thrill of almost being caught. Rather, in a public of consenting adults who would mostly be pleased by the sight.
I arrived at Sir's and he knelt me by his couch to have a brief chat about slavery/submission. It was really illuminating for me. As most newbies in the scene already know, idenities like boy, sub, pup, and slave are obviously self identified and therefore only have loose definitions. Still, talking to Larry really cleared up some of the intangibility of some of these identities and made things a lot more easy for me to grasp. After talking to him, I am more sure of my boy identity than I have ever been. Did you hear that world? At this time in my life, I am a boy! hahaha
So after the talk, Sir took me to the Eagle. For those of you unaware, there are Eagle bars all across the country that typically act as the main leather bar of the city. At the DC Eagle, Sir took me upstairs where it was a bit more dark and typically reserved for people actually in leather. Once we got up there Sir said hi to a few friends while I stood (always) a step behind him on his left. When spoken to, I was very polite, eager, and hopefully charming. If I wasn't spoken to, I was silent. This lasted for about ten mins or so until Sir decided it was time to put me in more suitable attire. He stripped me down to a white jock strap, my sneakers, and white crew socks. *Sidenote: for those of you who don't know, SNEAKERS ARE A HUGE FAUX PAS IN ACTUAL LEATHER JOINTS. I did not have boots at the time, but have since purchased an inexpensive pair!* After being stripped, I was mitted and then wrists cuffed behind my back. Lastly, I was gagged tightly with a black ballgag. For the next fifteen mins or so I just followed Sir around as he socialized. It really felt amazing. I loved every minute of it because it was a clear visual cue of my inner submissive nature. I was not only recognized as a sub, but was humbled by a Sir and given a clear purpose.
It was then that several young college guys I know from a rival school showed up to recruit people for an HIV study they were conducting. It was slightly awkward at first to be seen like this by people who not only didn't know me in this context, but were not a part of, and probably didn't understand the leather scene. Still, their company was well appreciated as I am a huge supporter of HIV/AIDS outreach initiatives, research, and education. I got back into regular garb to participate in the study and 30 mins later came back and got into my mitts and gag. We spent another 40 mins or so there just socializing, obviously with me being admired but recognized as a sub, and not addressed directly. All in all, it was a great night of exploration. Hope to do it again.
Saturday, September 20, 2008
Thursday, September 18, 2008
Alright, sorry for the delay
So its been about three months since I last posted, and quite a bit has happened.
I arrived back at school for my final year after one of the most difficult summers of my life. I lost the Sir I loved more than anything, and with it, lost the ability to express myself as a boy. I was never aware at how much of a sub I was until I met Him, and now that he is gone I really just don't know what to do. No more bed time, no more grade minimums, no more any of it... Still, I have to keep chugging along with life.
I had met a local DC Sir a year or so ago just to grab coffee and discuss Dom/sub, Master/slave relationships. Sir Larry and I clicked well from that first meeting, but it never turned into actual boy training until about 6 months ago. He would have me over for random chores (polishing His leathers) or play. Coming back off the summer, I def wanted to reconnect with him. So far we have met up twice. On the first occasion, Sir tied me face down spread eagle to his bed and gagged me with his dirty briefs. Since I have quite the hairy little butt, he thought it was best if he shaved it smooth and proceeded to do so over the next twenty minutes. While I was still tied, I could tell just from his touch that I was perfectly smooth. For him, this meant I was finally primed for a good spanking.
Now one of the reasons I had met up with Sir in the first place was to expand my pain limits. I have a very low tolerance for pain and as an experienced and weathered SM top, I knew I could trust him to help me open up. This was our first spanking session, and it ended up being a really hot scene. He started very lightly; giving me soft open palmed slaps on each cheek. He would gradually, but steadily increase the intensity and I was surprised at how hard I was. With the non-spanking hand he would stroke my raging hard on which pressed against the sheets in between my legs. My NY Daddy had only ever used spanking for real discipline, so I was surprised at how into it I was. He would occasionally ask if I wanted it harder. Without even thinking I would BEG him through my gag for harder smacks. After a point I could tell he was really using my ass hard and I was really turned on. I moaned into my gag with every smack and he kept jerking me off. Inevitably, I ended up shooting a huge load all over the bed mid spank.
More to come, and once I am done catching up I will be updating this much more regularly.
I arrived back at school for my final year after one of the most difficult summers of my life. I lost the Sir I loved more than anything, and with it, lost the ability to express myself as a boy. I was never aware at how much of a sub I was until I met Him, and now that he is gone I really just don't know what to do. No more bed time, no more grade minimums, no more any of it... Still, I have to keep chugging along with life.
I had met a local DC Sir a year or so ago just to grab coffee and discuss Dom/sub, Master/slave relationships. Sir Larry and I clicked well from that first meeting, but it never turned into actual boy training until about 6 months ago. He would have me over for random chores (polishing His leathers) or play. Coming back off the summer, I def wanted to reconnect with him. So far we have met up twice. On the first occasion, Sir tied me face down spread eagle to his bed and gagged me with his dirty briefs. Since I have quite the hairy little butt, he thought it was best if he shaved it smooth and proceeded to do so over the next twenty minutes. While I was still tied, I could tell just from his touch that I was perfectly smooth. For him, this meant I was finally primed for a good spanking.
Now one of the reasons I had met up with Sir in the first place was to expand my pain limits. I have a very low tolerance for pain and as an experienced and weathered SM top, I knew I could trust him to help me open up. This was our first spanking session, and it ended up being a really hot scene. He started very lightly; giving me soft open palmed slaps on each cheek. He would gradually, but steadily increase the intensity and I was surprised at how hard I was. With the non-spanking hand he would stroke my raging hard on which pressed against the sheets in between my legs. My NY Daddy had only ever used spanking for real discipline, so I was surprised at how into it I was. He would occasionally ask if I wanted it harder. Without even thinking I would BEG him through my gag for harder smacks. After a point I could tell he was really using my ass hard and I was really turned on. I moaned into my gag with every smack and he kept jerking me off. Inevitably, I ended up shooting a huge load all over the bed mid spank.
More to come, and once I am done catching up I will be updating this much more regularly.
Monday, June 30, 2008
10 Things to Know
As you'll read in the description, this blog is aimed at bridging the gap between the leather community and those clean cut, preppy boys (and girls, but my experience is mostly with gay men) who were always curious about bondage/sm... but turned off by the perception of leather as old, fat, hairy men. A friend of mine suggested I start with a list of basic things you should know before you start exploring. So here are 10 things you all should know:
1. Start with your dick! Look at porn! What makes you hot? The community is large and has a variety of fetishes: BDSM, gear, leather, etc... Look at porn and check out kinky social sites! While the sense of community can be great, it really all starts with play. So, what are you into?
2. And this is directly related to #1: use porn as an inspiration, not as a rulebook. When it comes to BDSM and D/s relationships, a lot of people have made the mistake of trying to be just like the guys they saw in some hot porn. At best this can lead to disappointment. At worst it can put you in real danger. Porn and erotica are not real! They are scripted and designed to make our dicks twitch. While it may sound hot, being tied up for five days straight isn't terribly realistic.
3. Start slow. Now you are all horny and ready to go, but don't rush things. This whole world can be overwhelming if you try to become too many things at once. Take the time to figure out who you are when it comes to kink!
4. Be open and honest. If you want to tell your boyfriend you are curious about fetish play, then tell him! Drop hints if you want, but I find being blunt and open works best. If you are starting a D/s relationship, be open and honest about what exactly you want and realistically can handle (I recommend jerking off before these discussions so you aren't thinking with your dick heh). Even if you're just starting to play with someone new, find ways to slip it in or your partner won't know.
5. Don't be an ageist. If you aren't into older men, that is your business, but be respectful. I have learned from a lot of different men, some of them much older than me. What I have learned from them has helped me explore my sexuality deeper than I otherwise could have. Whether friends or lovers, be open to the more experienced.
6. Do some research. As much as I recommend having mentors in the scene, make the effort to educate yourself. There is plenty of literature on kink and BDSM, both online and in print (I highly recommend "The Ties that Bind" by: Guy Baldwin).
7. Be accepting of other people's sexuality. It is a little hypocritical to judge another guy's kink when you like to get pissed on. By normative sex standards, we are all pretty fucked up, so try not to be too judgemental. Just say "that isn't really my scene, but its cool if you are into it". If you disagree, try to consider the parallels between this and homophobia.
8. Know yourself. This is a multifaceted rule. Know what you love, like, tolerate, and won't do in terms of play. Also try to figure out why you are looking for certain things. Most kink is perfectly healthy sexual behavior. However, make sure you aren't getting into something for the wrong reason. For example: some "slaves" want to loose all their rights and privileges because their life is shit and they are looking for an escape. Since no Master is capable of fixing everything, it never works out for either partner.
9. Protect yourself. If a situation seems really shady: it probably is. Once you are tied up, you really are in the other person's hand, so make sure they are trustworthy. If you are meeting someone online for the first time: leave a note saying where you'll be and who you are meeting (with a friend or just on your desk so if you go missing the police will find it and track down the psycho who, unfortunately, has killed and/or kidnapped you). Make sure the guy you are meeting knows about this. If he is really uncomfortable with it, explain your reasoning. If he is still uncomfy, move on.
10. Talk about it. Don't feel the need to be too graphic, but the more we talk about kink, the less taboo it becomes. All my friends know I am a kinky little pig. Plenty of them have even confided in me that they have their own interests they have wanted to explore. When we all open up, we make kink more accessible, and therefore more fun!
Last but not least: HAVE FUN!
1. Start with your dick! Look at porn! What makes you hot? The community is large and has a variety of fetishes: BDSM, gear, leather, etc... Look at porn and check out kinky social sites! While the sense of community can be great, it really all starts with play. So, what are you into?
2. And this is directly related to #1: use porn as an inspiration, not as a rulebook. When it comes to BDSM and D/s relationships, a lot of people have made the mistake of trying to be just like the guys they saw in some hot porn. At best this can lead to disappointment. At worst it can put you in real danger. Porn and erotica are not real! They are scripted and designed to make our dicks twitch. While it may sound hot, being tied up for five days straight isn't terribly realistic.
3. Start slow. Now you are all horny and ready to go, but don't rush things. This whole world can be overwhelming if you try to become too many things at once. Take the time to figure out who you are when it comes to kink!
4. Be open and honest. If you want to tell your boyfriend you are curious about fetish play, then tell him! Drop hints if you want, but I find being blunt and open works best. If you are starting a D/s relationship, be open and honest about what exactly you want and realistically can handle (I recommend jerking off before these discussions so you aren't thinking with your dick heh). Even if you're just starting to play with someone new, find ways to slip it in or your partner won't know.
5. Don't be an ageist. If you aren't into older men, that is your business, but be respectful. I have learned from a lot of different men, some of them much older than me. What I have learned from them has helped me explore my sexuality deeper than I otherwise could have. Whether friends or lovers, be open to the more experienced.
6. Do some research. As much as I recommend having mentors in the scene, make the effort to educate yourself. There is plenty of literature on kink and BDSM, both online and in print (I highly recommend "The Ties that Bind" by: Guy Baldwin).
7. Be accepting of other people's sexuality. It is a little hypocritical to judge another guy's kink when you like to get pissed on. By normative sex standards, we are all pretty fucked up, so try not to be too judgemental. Just say "that isn't really my scene, but its cool if you are into it". If you disagree, try to consider the parallels between this and homophobia.
8. Know yourself. This is a multifaceted rule. Know what you love, like, tolerate, and won't do in terms of play. Also try to figure out why you are looking for certain things. Most kink is perfectly healthy sexual behavior. However, make sure you aren't getting into something for the wrong reason. For example: some "slaves" want to loose all their rights and privileges because their life is shit and they are looking for an escape. Since no Master is capable of fixing everything, it never works out for either partner.
9. Protect yourself. If a situation seems really shady: it probably is. Once you are tied up, you really are in the other person's hand, so make sure they are trustworthy. If you are meeting someone online for the first time: leave a note saying where you'll be and who you are meeting (with a friend or just on your desk so if you go missing the police will find it and track down the psycho who, unfortunately, has killed and/or kidnapped you). Make sure the guy you are meeting knows about this. If he is really uncomfortable with it, explain your reasoning. If he is still uncomfy, move on.
10. Talk about it. Don't feel the need to be too graphic, but the more we talk about kink, the less taboo it becomes. All my friends know I am a kinky little pig. Plenty of them have even confided in me that they have their own interests they have wanted to explore. When we all open up, we make kink more accessible, and therefore more fun!
Last but not least: HAVE FUN!
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